Parenting

So of course there is a bunch of stuff I said I would NEVER do. Then I had some kids.  So of  course I was like I would never pee on myself. Or spank or holler, etc.

I am listening to a webinar right now with a "parenting coach" who is borderline ridiculous.  The webinar is free, and I am wondering if all the people in the chat are actually plants.  There is way too much contributing going on.  And this woman is great except she thinks it's possible to never yell in order to enforce a rule, never give time outs and never use the count to three. So basically everything I use is out and when I walk into the kitchen to find Teddy making a stew of carrots, onions, and sisters, I am supposed to immediately sit down in an advanced yoga pose and start humming calmly.  She has two kids, so I don't know what her deal is. I just saw a picture so maybe they aren't real.  She sounds very peppy.  I think she is on uppers.  Maybe she needs to teach 25 kids in a classroom with no teacher's aide for a year.

I mean, I am a pretty calm parent.  I don't yell a lot or spank.  This does not mean I am super awesome at parenting. It means I use other methods that are probably equally as terrifying to kids. Like sighing loudly. I am definitely a sigher. The message is the same.  You. Are. Annoying. Me.  And a lot of the things our parents used certainly worked - the holler, the spank the what have you.  So I definitely try not to judge when I see or hear parents doing what I consider somewhat crazy things. You wanna tie your kid to a backpack and attach it to your ankle?   Who am I to judge? Maybe being a teacher I have seen more parenting in action. Nobody knows how really hard it is unless they are in your situation.  Oh wait, the webinar lady is trying to sell me something. I am so surprised.

Oh okay so one of the things I said I would never do but now is actually a good thing. (So not like soiling one's self or wearing a diaper.)  Crazy weird exercise classes.  I would look at those guys and be like, um, no.  Not for me. I used to belong to LA Fitness, and did Zumba and yoga there. But then it made more sense to switch to the Y for the kids, so now I have a strong-willed Scorpio daughter who pretty much, at two years of age, rules the roost.  So I take whatever class is going on at the time E decides she has eaten enough crackers and tried on enough of mommy's shoes and now she wants to go to "school".

Consequently I have found myself in spinning classes (never thought I would do that), body combat classes, body pump classes and pretty much any class you can think of.  If it is at the right time, I just walk in and take it. So far I have been able to avoid step classes, but I am sure I will eventually bite that bullet. I have to say, I am glad I decided to try the new classes, but I am a little wary of all the PROPS.

Zumba and yoga and body combat (where you punch the air) are pretty low key.  Body pump you need a barbell and free weights and a bench. Cx works you need a pilates tube and free weights and a mat. It can get a little complicated.  As long as nobody tells me to bring the toenails of a dragon, I am good to go, I guess.