For all the Southpaws

So yesterday was a toughie. Ted spent half the day in the principal's office because he punched a girl in the face. Then he got kicked out of his tennis class at they Y and then there was more punching of his sister at home.  I had just about had it at that point, and we had some words before bedtime.  In general, I am not a hollerer. Or a spanker.  This little one does push me to my limits though.

So last night after the fifth or sixth indiscretion, I told Ted, "You can't expect to see change if you don't change."  I try to keep it simple because he is seven.  I told him:  We are all trying to help you but you are not helping yourself. I left it at that.

This morning, I was very serious, which is not like me.I took both of his hands in mine.  I asked him, "Ted which hand do you use to hit people?"  He showed me his right hand.  I said, "This is the hand that you use without thinking. If I throw a ball to you unexpectedly, you will use this hand to catch it. But it is also the hand that hits, the hand that smacks, and pushes and does things we don't want it to do.  We will call it the hurting hand."  I held up his left hand and asked, "What do you think we will call this hand?"  Blank stare.   I continued, "This will be the helping hand. It will be the hand you think about before you use, but it will be the hand that helps the other."   So I told him,"In every decision you make today, we want to try to use the helping hand."

Then we traced both hands on paper.  On his hurting hand, he wrote the words that hurt on the fingers: pushing, smacking, hitting, etc.  On the helping hand, he used those fingers to write helping words:  handshakes, high fives, hugs, back scratches.  I said, today we will try to think before we use that hurting hand.  If we have no problems, great.  If we still do, tomorrow, a glove goes on the hurting hand.  You will look silly wearing a glove all day in the middle of Spring, but it is a reminder not to use that hurting hand.  (There can also be a hurting foot which will be socked, of course.)

Come hell or high water, that boy will behave by second grade.  If I have to sit with him through every class; I feel I have to nip this in the bud.  I'm sharing it with you, Bloggy, in case it could help others.  (Also, I may make Ted ambidextrous as a side project :)