Bear You On; the Breath of Dawn!

GREAT DAY!  First of all the vending machine at the YMCA gave me a gold dubloon back when I put a dollar bill in it to purchase chippies. I would have stood there all day but the second attempt yielded nothing.


Okay so obvs I woke my kids up pretending to be a dog this morning.  At first I was a little dog, like maybe a Chiuauauauauauauaua or a  daschaushcaushaushaund. But then they didn't get up. So I became a big dog. Like a bear. But I did all the barking and the panting in the ear (essential) until those mf-ers got some cereal.


So I had to take Ted to his therapist today and the girls came with.  While we were in the waiting room, we had an hour to kill.  Now, there are so many thngs you can do with an hour.  And the girls. The hour and some girls. . I mean. really.  And I am not even gonna try to lie, if you had a nanny cam in that lobby waiting room, you would have seen us in several different costume changes throughout the hour (pan to me wearing E's clothes and vice versa), but they also had an edition of Brain Quest for 5th graders that I read aloud whilst pretending to be a ballerina.

And of course as Helen answered (and the 12 step group came through the lobby about three different times) I was plieing and releveing and scissor kicking  and apologizing (but not really meaning it) and then finally E and I just got on the floor and started all out tumbles.  So fun.

Then after all of THAT, I went to the church choir practice.  That's right.  Mama's got some lungs. But I am tiny and little so I just wanted to go and like watch but of course the choir practice is like a freaking country club that has legacies going on for decades so I walk in and they are like SO ARE YOU A SOPRANO OR AN ALTO?

And I shit you not, I said, you may as well be speaking German to me.  And the woman was like can you read music, and I stared at her with my greeny green eyes.  Blankety blank blank smile,.See, Blog, my EYES were saying I am the smartest human on the planet, but HER eyes were reading where did you get that dye job? So then of course she dismissed me.  Which is pretty much the worst thing you can do to mystretchypants.  Cause you know it's always gonna come back to haunt ya.

So whatevs, I was like if we can Raise You up on Eagle's Wings everything's gonna be okay.